Luton Town: The Non-League Years by Rob Hadgraft

Book review: There are a plethora of books on Luton Town’s recent history. As well as this one there are no less than three others by the same author (Luton Town: Through the Trap Door: From Championship to Conference 2004-2009, Luton Town: Staring into the Abyss: Minus 30 - the Coldest Place in Football, Luton Town - the Dark Side of the Moon: Journey into the Unknown 2009-2010). And there is even a book about our first season back in the league 2014-15 (Luton Town: Back Where We Belong: A season of dream, or a lesson in reality). Maybe when the current season is over (2015-16) another book will be hitting the shelves. So perhaps the market is overheated and perhaps there are cross-overs in what each book is covering but at least as a Luton fan you can’t say you aren’t well catered for. 

I haven’t read them all so can’t make comparisons and pick out the best one, but I have read this one and can comment on it in isolation from my viewpoint of being a Luton fan and being present at many of the matches featured in this book covering out non-league years from seasons 2009-10 to 2013-14. 

There were some interesting sound bites in this book: 

• “It was clear summer jaunts to the USA and Asia would be off Luton’s agenda for some time to come.” When were these ever on Luton’s agenda? 
• “We were now ranked 101st in England – the lowest point in my lifetime and quite probably in the last 100 years or so” – if you’re going to say things like this maybe you could be a bit more specific 
• A game versus Grays: “Not since Manchester United played Barnsley in the Premier League had there been a bigger gulf between two clubs in the same division” Nice sound bite but hard to prove. 
• On Jason Walker and his famous Panenka penalty v AFC Wimbledon: “it was high-risk and only attempted by the supremely skilful, supremely confident…. Even Peter Crouch had come a cropper.” Yes even the supremely skilful Peter Crouch. 
• “Loanee Jake Robinson debuted but made little impact at the Impact Arena” Don’t know how this made it into the book given the player in question went on to play just 7 Conference games in total for Luton making “little impact” before leaving, perhaps it is for the wordplay.  
• On a 5-0 win over Kettering: “the most one-sided league match ever seen at Kenilworth Road” – even more so than our 12-0 against Bristol Rovers in 1936 which I presume the author was at so as to offer his opinion? 
• “as the great French poet Rimbaud wrote…” – sorry, you lost me. 
• On Luton’s away following at Welling “a massive 75 per cent of the 2,650 were away supporters. Surely some sort of record?” Er, no because on the next away game at Hyde the author writes: “a crowd that was more than 80 per cent Luton fans” 

There are some depressing bits too as the writer talks about all the booing and abuse that Luton got during this time: 

• “Despite being unbeaten after five games, Luton had been booed off by their own fans three games in a row.” 
• After his third league game in charge, a 0-0, Richard Money said “I have never before been subjected to the abuse I received at Chester. I remember walking off the pitch thinking – wow, what is going on here?” 

• After 10 games played in 2011-12: “We went top for the first time in more than a year, yet players, fans and management all headed home dissatisfied.” 

Even the author gets stuck into the team: 

• “We had no divine right to beat clubs of the stature of Braintree and Dartford, of course, but losing to part-timers is an embarrassment all the same, especially for the long-standing supporters like this writer” 

But then there are better moments, like when the author brings out of the quaintness of following a football team in the non-league after being in the League for so long: 

• On Forest Green away – “We parked at the local primary school in an area that looked as if Compo and Clegg from Last in the Summer Wine would go cycling by at any moment.” 
• On Histon's ground: “this exposed meadow in the Fens” 
• On Welling away: “there was a friendly atmosphere here that made it feel rather like a Saturday afternoon church fete.” 

And then there are the shared good on-field memories where the author covers things such as the emergence of Andre Gray (now Championship player of the year and surely destined for the Premier League shortly), the purple patch we had towards the end of 2009-10 when Gnakpa ate his soup and the team smashed in the goals, and of course the promotion winning season. 

So a depressing read in places and a more uplifting read in others.

Luton Town: The Non-League Years can be bought from AMAZON.

Philip's Children's Atlas by David and Jill Wright

• Book review: This children's atlas is aimed for 7-12 year olds. For that age group I think it is excellent.
  
  
  The book is full colour with maps and photos and images throughout. It starts off with some general bits and pieces about the planet Earth, like where it is in the solar system, and explains things in simple terms. For example population density is explained very well. Then it looks at areas of the world in more detail starting with Europe. This includes a focus on the main countries that children will be learning about at this time at school. There is also a focus on all the 50 states of the US which is useful general knowledge to have.
  
  
  All the pages have just the right amount of info on them for the age group. They are in bite-sized chunks. Of course there could be more info but that's what the internet is for.
  
  
  My 9-year-old daughter is probably best placed to give an opinion. She says this book is good because "it tests your knowledge, has brilliant facts and is easy for children to understand."

Children's Atlas by David and Jill Wright

Socks: The Rule Book by Sock Club London

Book review: I have often wondered as I meander along the sunny beaches of my home town Luton in my little white shorts whether it is appropriate to be wearing these thick socks with my sandals. Now thanks to this book I know the answer.

I have also often wondered to myself what socks I should wear when I grace the top quality park-maintained tennis courts of my home town Luton in my white sports t-shirt, white training shoes, white sweatband and little white shorts (not to mention my fancy racquet). And thanks to this book I now know.

What’s more I have also often wondered to myself as I’ve traversed the gold-paved streets in my home town Luton during coldest winter when even the snowmen are going indoors to get out of the cold what socks I should be wearing to compliment my winter costume of polar bear fur hat, coat and little white shorts (made from the polar-bear’s face), and thanks to this book I now know.

Yes, this book has changed my life. Gone are the days when I walked into parties only to be shunned by all and sundry because my novelty Tinky Winky socks were simply not fit for polite society. These days I can stride in with my head held high knowing that, after many hours of deliberation beforehand, my sock game will be top notch and that all the ladies will soon be swarming towards me urgently wanting to hear about how I moved up the sock ranks so quickly to become the true sock aficionado I am today.

True I needed to chuck the kids and wife out to make room for my suddenly expanded sock collection, but that doesn’t matter because I now have the finest merino wool socks money can buy. And even though I had to remortgage the house and max out all my credit cards I know that when I slip my foot into that hand-linked toe sock with the argyle pattern my worries will just slip away.

However there is a part of me that wonders if this book hasn’t just duped me, as if in this book isn't just one big advert for Sock Club London and their cult where anonymous members live by the motto “No apologies, no regrets”. When I think these thoughts I become morose, stop ironing my socks and start throwing them around the room instead before also emptying my sock drawers in a massive rage before breaking down just like a girl wondering just why did I let my wife and children go.

Overall then this is a great book, but please bear in mind the small caveat as mentioned above.

Amazon UK link: Socks: The Rule Book

Creature Teacher: Science Shocker by Sam Watkins and illustrated by David O'Connell

Book review: "Mr Hyde wasn't normal - he was extraordinary. Officially the Best Teacher in the Universe. But he did have one teeny, tiny, humungous problem..."

And that is what the Creature Teacher books are all about, Mr Hyde and his problem (you can see that problem on the cover just above the title as Mr Hyde transforms into the Creature).

This is the third in the series but is perfectly fine as a stand-alone, although you might wonder why a character is called Woodstock. Mr Hyde's class are at the Whizz-BANG Science Fair exhibiting their exhibit "Have you got a tissue?" But when Teacher turns into Creature there is all manner of chaos and it is all captured in here.

I read this with my 9-year-old daughter. She enjoyed it and thought it was funny.

Amazon UK link: Creature Teacher: Science Shocker